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 Posted 7/23/2009 9:12:59 PM |
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| This year has been quite a year tonight was night 5..we have one left Family night--ANd I almost dreading it. I never thought in the 6 years directing VBS I would have to tell Children not to return But tonight I found myself having to tell 6 children 2 sets of boys not to return. ONe set was 3rd and 4th graders I warned the boys and told them we are not here ot call names and make fun of our classmates or others--I also explained to the that if it happened again they would be removed for the rest of the week. (I had a mother come over to my house and 3 email me, Plus had leaders come to me about it--Plus children). Needless to say they had a little girl in tears tonight.....One of my helpers is a friend of there family and walkes them home she told the mother she came over apoligized and tooked the boys home. The other was not as well we do pick some kids up..and well the other night I had some calls and emails about these boys saying cured and rude things (6th grade boys) to 4th and 2nd grade girls. So I pulled the boys to the side and told them this will not be tolerated and if it happened again they would be removed! Tonight after sitting through the lesson with one of our ADD kid church children. I went out to our foyer and here was the one boy-and-Teen leader was all but in tears..The PAstor and my co-director between them. Appartently my co-director happened to be walking by when the little girl walked over and said the boys are saying ********** about her(there leader), APparently she forgot one of the main rules..come get me if you have a problem...Needless to say the boy denied everything--THe girl said he put his hand in her face He said I don't do that when I questioned about what he was saying in Spanish he also told me can't talk spanish. SO feeling bad about already having 3 boys not returning--I switched leaders for the group but told the boys if they have a bad attitude tomorrow they would not be welcomed back. We are not here to pick on each other and be nasty to other we are her to have an awesome time in GOD! Well needless to say...the kid went wack on me and started waving his hand in my face saying don't worry I'm not coming back cause I don't want to see your ugly face you ****** and start yelling at me in SPanish--He was leaving the church when this all happened(thank God) and our male transportation man got him and escorted him to his seat. How do you handle kids like this--The other year we had kids who parents made them come they were miserable because they didn't want to be there--So we spoke with the parents and some of the kids stayed home. I nevered dreamed I tell kids not to come to VBS..BUt how can you reach out to others when some are too mean and distuptive to reach the ones who want reached. Blessings, Jenn in PA
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| Posted 7/25/2009 8:19:15 AM |
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| So sorry to hear about your troubles. I don't have an answer. It is very hard especially since VBS is the big outreach of our year. I agree that it is not fair to the ones who want to enjoy themselves when you have distractions and even disresepect. I would feel bad for kicking kids out however, I do believe it is a privilege to participate, not a right. If anyone has any ideas it would be appreciated by all. The worst we had are sulky kids because they aren't in a group with their friends or boys who play fight each other. This year I had a couple of teen leaders who kept disappearing. Ugh.
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| Posted 8/7/2009 9:16:29 AM |
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I'm having similar problems. Keep praying. It's so hard. We want them to come to christ but at the same time we can not tolerate this type of behavior. I will pray for your VBS. I ended up in tears last night over the rude behavior and lack of attention to such an important topic of Jesus dying on the cross for them and they didn't even want to listen. But God knows everything, He is sovereign and He is in control. Trust God. God Bless.
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| Posted 8/7/2009 12:50:46 PM |
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| Wow. I can only think that these boys were being used by the Enemy to prevent others from hearing the Gospel. You must be doing something right to be attacked in such a manner! I believe when it gets this bad you sometimes have no choice but to remove them for the good and possibly safety of the others. Perhaps you or the pastor could follow up with the family and listen to their struggles. I'm sure these boys behave the same way at home and school. Perhaps your church could be the means of bringing God's healing and help for these families. God bless.
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| Posted 9/5/2009 7:10:48 PM |
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| I added Buddies this year to help with this issue -- any child that needs extra "LOVE" is assigned a Buddie - My buddies are adults who maybe can only come a few days or I also use some of my guys who sign up for just this reason. The Buddie stays with that child the whole time - that way the crew leader can stay focused and the Buddie takes over that childs care. For my older kids - I also developed a mentor program this year - I have a fantastic guy who heads this area up - He assists my games director - so kids that are not wanting to be there or kids that are right at the age cut off that don't want to be "IN" VBS - Or the older kids that grandma drops off and says "Oh they are here to help!!!" Go into this group - They help set up for games and clean up - they are given responsiblities and t-shirts - they also work on service projects that we need done. They go to the opening and closing oh yeah and SNACK time! It worked extremely well this year - I will work on taking it to the next level for next year -- but would recommend it highly. You must have someone to lead it that understands valueing and connecting with kids that need extra love. The kids bonded beautifully - last year I was pulling my hair out - this year these kids "LOVED VBS" who knew?!??!?!?!?
K
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