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Forum Newbie
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Hey there Everyone,
I'm not sure where to start with this post but I know that I need help. I've been in my current youth ministry role for about 5 years and through that time I've seen God do some neat stuff. However, recently I feel as though my passion, excitement and creativity in ministry have just vanished. I'm just going through the motions each week. It's horrible to say but I see it as a chore to try to connect with kids each week at church. I'm tired of trying to get kids out to youth events and I just have little desire anymore. I've struggled with my attitude in all of this (especially when our numbers seem to dip lower and lower). I don't know what I need. I want to be able to start each day with the Lord and have my relationship with him energize me. Deep down I know I love seeing kids changed in Christ but I keep feeling like its time to move on . . . . anyone relate.
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Forum Expert
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Last Login: 3/14/2010 11:34:28 AM
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My friend,
I have been there many times and understand your heart and the constant conflict of not knowing what to do and wondering where your passion has gone. For me it was the result of an overloaded calendar, lack of time off (regular and vacation) and poor leadership that failed to invest in me. There were days I didn't want to get out of bed on Sunday morning simply because I didn't want to put on the mask that was seemingly plaguing my life.
the only factor that motivated me to action was the hope today just might be different and just maybe this would be the day it would all turn around and I would see God do something great. In retrospect I can tell you in those moments of frustration and despair I would try to remember His promise in Romans 8.28 and the details of that verse re-establishing everything in my life, positive and negative, were there to shape me for His service and would work out to be for my good.
Focus on your calling, take some time away (SYMC is coming up in Feb), refocus your life and listen to His still, small voice reaffirming you are His child.
Matt Mc, forum moderator
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Junior Member
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Last Login: 2/2/2010 6:47:56 PM
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Some random thoughts-
1. You need time off for prayer & refreshment (what about the Group Youth Conference or just a prayer retreat?). If I don't do this on a yearly manner, I burn out.
2. Are you a reader? I am challenged, inspired, encouraged a lot through reading books (ie "Victorious Prayer" by Thrasher, "Following Christ" by Joe Stowell, "Leadership as an Identity" by Crawford Lorrits, etc.).
3. 2 Timothy 2:1-3 If you are willing to pass the torch of faith to the next generation, then that is a starting point. Most Christians aren't willing to even do that. Your willingness is something God will use.
4. I feel like quitting weekly. I get frustrated at apathy, tired of problems & sin in others, angry at sin in myself.
5. How is your walk with the Lord? Is there any sin that may be drying you out?
Just some thoughts. If you are passionate at all, you will consider quitting! Ministry is tough.
Jeff
----
Love God
Love People
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Forum Guru
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Dear youthpastordude:
Yes, I can relate. I'm sorta there too. In his book, Your First Two Years In Youth Ministry, Doug Fields has two great chapters on burn-out and discouragement. He suggests that the problem is more about our relationships with God than not being excited about ministry anymore or being over worked. I'm considering this by doing an honest self-evaluation.
The fact that Group magazine January issue again devoted a feature article to the subject of burnout pretty much says that we're not alone. It could be as simple as a sunlight deficiency (S.A.D. happens a lot this time of year). I keep hearing the idea of spiritual retreats. This I do a lot during camping season. This may help if the problem isn't very deep but deep problems can't always be solved in a weekend.
About quitting: It's one avenue to take. First decide if the Holy Spirit wants you to. Also, consider what your long term dream for the church is. If staying will help realize the dream stay, if not maybe it's time to step aside.
Work load: As a volunteer now I have reduced my work load to just teaching Sunday school. It's what I do best.
I am attending the conference coming up. Maybe it will rev me back up. Maybe I'll see you there. E-mail me if you want to talk more. God knows your heart so you can always be honest with Him.
It could be an enemy attack too. Sometimes I use the Jar Jar Binks method of defense: Throw up your hands and surrender. "I give up!" If God wants something done He'll get it done.
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Forum Newbie
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Last Login: 2 days ago @ 7:48:11 AM
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| Thanks so much for the words of wisdom and encouragement. One of the big keys is relying on the Lord. I know that I need to rest is his strength and follow his lead. This is easier said then done. Many times I think that if I program everything perfectly then the ministry will run like a well oiled machine. I need to depend on God and remember that its not about me at all. Thanks for all your ideas!
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Forum Expert
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Last year was my 7th year at our church. Our church staff gets a sabbatical every 5 or 7 years (you get more time off at 7 years than 5). We can take up to 3 months off with pay. Going into my sabbatical I was wondering if I was still effective and should I keep going in youth ministry. The time away from the day in and day out and all the responsibilities and being stressed by people who were struggling was huge. I came back refreshed (even though I took my sabbatical to help my wife with our newborn twins) and ready to roll.
Make sure you take some time off. Make sure you use your vacation. Make sure you take a day off each week. When you are off or on vacation "go dark" and make sure your time off is truly time "off" from your ministry. Focus on your walk, focus on your family, focus on having some fun.
Andy
Reaching Students to Discover Life in Christ
www.theaddyouthpastor.com
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Forum Member
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The work of youth ministry is hard. I'm not going to throw verses at you about endurance, etc, because I bet you know them, have read them and are just tired of everything... . However, there is a bit of self care that you can work on and see if it helps.
One is making sure you keep a sabbath and keep it holy. Undefiled by work and anything looking like work. If that means leaving a cell phone behind, getting out of town, whatever it takes so that you are left alone and people who drain on you leave you alone, do it.
Another is reading, but I like sustainable youth ministry, it is a good read also.
Get a hobby, do something that isn't necessarily youth ministry related. I referee football in the fall and I play softball in the spring. its good to vent...
Get mentors in your life who just care about you and your soul. Get those people, probably outside your church that can help you keep healthy.
I wish you well.
Matt Murphy
Denver Seminary Youth Ministry Student, Social Worker, Middle School Youth Worker
http://web.me.com/matthew.murphy79/Engaging_the_Shadows/Engaging_the_Shadow.html
moderator @ pastor2youth.com
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Forum Newbie
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I know exactly how you feel. I have been in youth ministry for 10 years and I have had seasons of doubt and frusteration several times in my ministry. There are always several different factors that lead up to these times. The biggest is my spiritual life and the lack of investment in my personal spiritul growth. It's hard when we are so busy helping everyone else. Recently I have been struggeling with feeling to old to be a youth pastor. I'm 32 with three children and I often get tired of chasing other peoples kids around when I have my own to chase. I also get weary of not having many adult relationships with others in the church. Every time there are other adults in the church I am with the teens. It can be a lonley place in youth ministry if you are not careful. I have recently felt like it may be time to move on to a diferent ministry position but I still love teens and love watching god turn their lights on. It's a hard decission to make, but one thing I have learned about these kinds of decissions is never to make them quickly. Take time to pray and wait. Sometimes it is God calling you to something else and sometimes it is just us having to deal with things not going our way or burnout. Time will allow you figure out which one it is and respond accordingly.
With Both Eyes on Jesuswww.cbcministry.org
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Forum Member
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Lots of sage advice on this board.
Was curious as to how you are coping now??
Denver Seminary Youth Ministry Student, Social Worker, Middle School Youth Worker
http://web.me.com/matthew.murphy79/Engaging_the_Shadows/Engaging_the_Shadow.html
moderator @ pastor2youth.com
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Forum Newbie
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Last Login: 2 days ago @ 7:48:11 AM
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| All of the replies have been extremely helpful to me. Yesterday I spent at hour and wrote a letter to God. It helped me get some thoughts and feelings out and move into some self-evaluation. God helped me to see from that exercise that attitude is everything. I was humbled by thinking about Philippians 2 - wow - Christ's attitude. My attitude has been poor. I'm stained by sin but can always look to God for help with my attitude. This Sunday will be quite interesting. We have Youth Sunday and I'm preaching . . . I need to draw deep from God to approach that. Pray for me if you think of it. Thanks again!
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